About Me

I LOVE life! I LOVE loving life!

I couldn't always say that, but I can say it now, and it feels good.

The past 13 years have been somewhat like a roller coaster ride. When my daughter was born, my life changed instantaneously. I was totally surprised by finding out my precious little baby girl had a number of medical, physical, and mental conditions that required a lot of attention. There had to be some mistake, I thought. But I found out it was not a dream, it was my reality, which felt more like a nightmare.

I learned all about life with doctors, nurses, hospitals, operations, endless appointments with doctors and therapists, tests, tests, and more tests. It was not something I had planned but I found myself thrown into it. I learned medical lingo and spent all my time trying to help my daughter and keeping her 21 month old brother happy. It was an incredibly busy time. I remember many days when I would look at the clock and realize it was 6:00 p.m. and I hadn't even had breakfast yet.

The first three and a half years of my daughter's life brought about big changes in me. I focused totally on my children and lost touch completely with the rest of the world. I was totally unaware of what was happening in the world, for I was in my own world. I shut everyone and everything else out. My marriage ended, and I isolated myself with my children.

I felt very alone in most respects but I figured that was how it had to be. Nothing mattered more than keeping my daughter alive and helping to rid her of the pain she felt all day, every day. I went through the angst of wondering whether my daughter would die and at the same time wondering what would happen if she lived. And what would happen to her if something terrible happened to me? These were thoughts that haunted me and I also felt guilty about my son. What kind of life was he living? He was just a little boy and he spent so much of his time in doctor's offices or hospitals, or listening to his sister cry.

I wondered what I had done to deserve this, because I thought I was being punished for not being good enough. There was no hope for me. I was going to live my life in seclusion and look after my daughter for the rest of my life. The decision had been made for me, and now I knew my purpose in life. It was to look after my daughter.

For awhile, several years in fact, I thought that was true, but there came a point in time when I started thinking there were other things in life for me to do yet. I didn't know what those things were, but it felt like something was missing, something was calling me towards it, but I didn't know what 'it' was. That has been, and continues to be, an evolving process. I do know I have transformed my life and I love loving life! I understand now the contrast I experienced and it has helped me to become the person I am today.

I am so grateful that I learned how to communicate with my Higher Self/God/Source, and that I am going downstream rather than bucking the current. I am deeply grateful and appreciative for:

Barbara Rose [Higher Self Communication]

Esther and Jerry Hicks [Abraham]

Gary Craig [EFT].

Those three areas in particular have helped me to understand and make peace with where I am. They have also shown me how to find inner peace, and to be able to receive my own inner guidance. And most importantly I have learned to love myself and how to guide others to do the same things I have learned.