Self-Love

I used to hear the words self-love and I would inwardly roll my eyes. It sounded like a bunch of gobbledy goop to me. I used to delete anything that sounded like love or self-love. In fact I distinctly remember one day reading a message about how important love is, and without it we are missing out on the greatest thing in life and we could never truly be happy.

I was actually angry when I read that. The way I interpreted it was something like this: If you aren't in a relationship you will never truly be happy. That's how much I DIDN'T get it! I became indignant that someone would tell me I couldn't be happy if I wasn't in a relationship.

Now I can really laugh about it all. Of course that wasn't the message at all, but that is where I was at then, and I interpreted it that way.

It wasn't any one thing that changed. Really it was me - I changed. Over the course of a few years I became interested in spirituality, and I started to understand and appreciate what self-love was all about.

There were a few people/books that really helped me to get the message. The first was Louise Hay. Barbara Rose helped me immensely. Abraham was the absolute icing on the cake - I really and truly got the message and understood what all the fuss was about.

I can tell you that once you discover genuine self-love, everything changes - for the better. I had a nudge to listen to the 2006 Abraham Caribbean Cruise CD's. The CD's had been sitting in my house for quite some time, but for some reason I had not listened to them.

I took them to my car and started listening to them. The last CD, in fact the last person in the 'hot seat', asked about self-love. As I listened to that section, I had tears streaming down my face. I totally GOT it. It was, and is, a beautiful part that I cherish.

I am copying the transcription of part of that section here for you to read. If you have ever heard Abraham, I think you will easily be able to hear this conversation in your mind.

Before you go further we want to say to you, very simply, that the only hindrance to self-love - we're just going to lay it out here where you can see it - What has caused an eroding of self-love within so many of you is comparing you and what you want with others and what they want and you and what you've got with others and what they've got. That's what causes an eroding of self-love. What causes an inclusion of self-love, an embracing of self-love, a loving of self is a 'not giving a rip what anybody else thinks' and having your eye only on this two vibrational points of relativity, where you, thought by thought, experience by experience, conversation by conversation, memory by memory, experience by experience, just train yourself into something that feels better and better and better and better and better. In other words, it is, if there was ever an inside job, it's got to be that.

Because, when you are taught love by somebody outside of you, like a mother loving you and you really feeling it, what has happened is, they're tuned in, tapped in turned on. They've already, for whatever reason, focused upon you in a way that they are a vibrational match to their inner being. And so, they are love. They are liquid love and as they hold you in their gaze they flood this all over you and you say, "Ooo, this feels so good. I want this always." But then you need their undivided attention. Then you need them to always be tuned in, tapped in turned on. Then you need them to hold you as their object of attention. And they will let you down EVERY time, the selfish buggers. Because they have other things they want to think about and they cannot hold themselves to that standard. And so, when you finally get it that while it feels good to be loved, nothing feels better in all of the Universe than to love.

. . .

But, the most important thing that we're saying to you is, this self-love that you think you're looking for is not love of self. It's Love that Is Self. And there's a difference. There is a difference between loving me and being me who loves. And it is being me who loves that is really you. And when you are me who loves it's easy to love that one and that one and that one and that one and that one and that one and that one and that one and that one and that one and that one and that one. And then it becomes irrelevant what your object of love is if you're loving. What difference does it make what is the reason, the focal point, for the love that you are feeling? What possible difference does it make? It would be like eating a really wonderful meal and while you are eating it being unhappy that you can't be eating that one and that one and that one and that one. It doesn't matter. Does it matter what you are eating that feels wonderful is and does it matter what your focal point of your love is as long as the love that you're feeling is the love that really is you, you see.

. . . . .

We wouldn't be looking for self-love. We would be looking for the part of self that does love. In other words rather than saying to someone that we love, "I want you to love me." We would begin training ourselves into a desire that says, "I love loving you. I love the feeling of loving you. And how you feel about me is irrelevant. I love the feeling of loving you."

Abraham-Hicks: Caribbean Cruise 2006